Wheels of Whispers - Chapter 5 and 6

Chapter 5.

At first, Mr. Palmer reluctantly, but anyhow, believed the stories Louis fed him, however, the boy’s enthusiasm and infamous reputation of not being always the most honest servant started to make him question his choice of amateur detectives, thus he decided to investigate a bit using his own methods – he put on his most endearing expression and went straight to Lady Ellsworth.

“Milady, I feel concerned about you in these devastating times. Would you be needing anything? For instance, additional assistance, aid, perhaps from a fine gentleman in a uniform specialized in criminality?”

“Oh, my Goodness, Mr. Palmer, you are dismaying me! Albeit…”

“I would like to apologize for my unthoughtful inquisitiveness.”

“Tsktsktsk, nonsense! Albeit I am afraid that a policeman would be truly needed to Somershill.”

“May I inquire the reason?”

“Oh, it is quite confidential, hitherto I have never had to confront such an event.”

“I assure you of my discreet behavior concerning the deed in question,” said the butler, barely masking his impatience.

“In that case… It has occurred to my attention that one of our servants wistfully wishes to engage herself in any kind of jurisdictional labor. I am convinced that it would be to her avail, were we to have a real policeman explain to her the absurdness of a woman becoming a member of Scotland Yard. Would that be a problem to arrange, Mr. Palmer?”

“No, of course not, milady. Would that be all?”

“Yes, you may go now.”

The butler gritted his teeth, clenched his fists and speedwalked out of the building and into the garden, where he started tearing his own hair. Of course, he should’ve known that this whole kidnapping thing was no more than a cheap excuse to laze! Eventually, he will have his revenge. They want crime? Then they should be given crime!

Chapter 6.

“… and, and, then came the old crow and started chasing us around with a broom. A very spiky one, might I add. Poor Elias was nearly hit, but I managed to intervene at the last second and told her to sod off and let us look through the bushes in her garden for some clues. I could’ve sworn I saw a horseshoe there!”

“Good heavens, your efforts are honorable, Louis, nevertheless, I strongly encourage you not to torment the villagers at next occasion unless you really are compelled to proceed so.”

“Understood, Mr. Palmer. May I go?”

“Of course!” said the butler with a sugar-sweet smile. He enjoyed watching Louis struggle to invent a believable story, meanwhile not getting carried away and accidentally revealing the truth.

After the houseboy got out of his sight, Mr. Palmer nonchalantly went to the stables, grabbed a broom, as inspired by the lie. He found some red paint in the basement, a headlike pumpkin, old clothes that were way out of fashion these days, and a perfect spot.

***

“¡Dulce Madre María de Jesús! What’s that?!” [Sweet Mother Mary of Jesus!]

The servants gathered around Mrs. Martinez, who was frantically kissing the rosary she always had with her and pointing at something that looked exactly like a…

“A corpse!” screamed the Lady, then checked whether there was anybody near her capable of catching her and fainted at Mr. Phelps.

“Meh, it’s no big deal. Grab the poor fella and throw him into a lake, just like they did after the battle with thousands of our national defense soldiers.”

“Ida, nobody cares about ’48.”

“I do!” after cursing a few moments, using phrases that cannot be implemented into the English language, the cook huffily left, followed by the coach and Edith who volunteered to look after the Lady.

Louis and Elias exchanged shocked looks, both thinking the same: Somerhill was better boring, meanwhile Mr. Palmer pretended to be deeply shaken. Florence, the only present woman, swallowed her fear and approached the lifeless body. She examined it long, after exclaiming happily:

“Gentlemen, this is not a dead man, but a prank! Somebody must’ve been in a funny mood and nearly managed to fool us all!”

“Perfect, Florence, you are a savior. Now would you be so kind and inform the rest of the household about the tricky deed somebody decided to pursue? Then please wash up the lounge, dust off the furniture and polish the cutlery, will you?” said the butler through gritted teeth, angry because of the quick failure of his plan to scare the boys in order stop them from “investigating” and rather get them back to work.

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